open thoughts

I am making the realization that there truly is a difference between life-change and transformation.

On January 26 I experienced life change. Last Tuesday Sara and I welcomed our precious daughter Ella into our world and our family. No ifs, ands, or buts about it... Life changed. In a great way I might add. The moment Ella was born I became a dad, a biological dad. See for me that was a life change. I changed from just a husband to a dad as well.

I am realizing, however, that I did not become a father at that moment. Sure maybe in title, but not for real. I am only beginning to realize that I have been and continue to be transformed into a father. As you well know transformation doesn't happen in an instant(as much as my generation has come to expect). Transformation doesn't even happen overnight. Transformation is a a process, an ongoing and active process. It requires time, a good bit of it actually. Quite frankly, I am good with that time requirement.

I am ready to learn along the way. I am prepared for it not to come naturally and that I will have to work for it. I believe I will survive and be the better for it.

I give thanks that fatherhood is not only life-changing but a transformational experience. One that I will cherish forever.

Do you think there is a difference between life-change and transformation? Let me know in the comments.

[Posted with iBlogger from my iPhone]

When Reality Hits

I feel like everyone I have ever spoken with has these moments, I mean, I hope it's not just me, but you get that overwhelming feeling of reality. You know what I mean... that moment reality plops right down in front of you and smacks you in the face. I have come to realize and embrace that this feeling comes out of nowhere. It's on no timetable. It just happens. Much like that catchy little slogan for feces.

This morning as I was getting ready for the day, it happened. Reality hit. For those of you who missed it Sara and I are going to be parents. January 29, 2010 is the big day. Somewhere near that day and time we will welcome a little person in the world, into our home, and into our family. Here are some of the things that crossed my mind this morning as reality hit me with a left hook:

Alan, you do well to take care of yourself and another human being who is most capable of caring for theirself, what are you going to do with one that relies solely on YOU! I imagined holding this little person in my arms and making the realization that there was an equal part of me and equal part of Sara and yet this little baby would be its own person, wonderfully made weaved together miraclously by the Great Creator and Life Giver (Yahweh). He/She will grow up exceptionally faster than I can imagine. He/she will change the way Sara and I do life together, in the best sense I know. This fragile little being will be our responsibility. What?! God, I know and understand you KNOW everything and order things in such a way that Your will will be accomplished. But...?

Then, I couldn't think of the question I needed or even wanted to ask. The silence fell in my mind. Reality had hit hard and I looked like one of the losers after a UFC fight. Dazed and confused. Wondering where I was and what in the world just happened. Here's the best part though, just as quickly as reality landed its breath-taking blow, peace rushed on me like rain. Yeah maybe it was just being in the shower, but it was a real experience. My mind cleared and I heard a small, still voice say, "You will be okay. As will your child, my child." Yes, that happened this morning.

What I realized in all of this is how thankful I am that the God who orchestrates reality, exists within it to not only empowers us to withstand reality's striking blows, but equips us to live in and through reality. And oh yeah, walks with us all the way. That's what I call AWESOME!!!

Share your Reality hitting moment by leaving a comment.